You watch more TV shows and movies on your computer than you do on TV and the movie theatre. You spend more time blogging about movies than watching them. You are genuinely excited whenever Apple releases a new computer (even though it only makes your current MacBook more obsolete). You IM people who are right next to you instead of talking to them. Your wife IM's you to get your attention. You don't need a blankie because your laptop keeps you warm at night. When you do finally get tired of using your laptop you pick up your phone and surf the web there. If it isn't online it doesn't exist. You open your laptop before you brew your first cup of coffee. When you call your laptop your wife and your wife your mistress.